Mindset Made Simple Tip #37
Control.
We have it. We give it away. We succumb to it.
Someone or something always has it!
As humans, we don’t like to be controlled. Yet taking control is difficult, time consuming and takes practice (other things we don’t always like).
No matter where you are in your season or life, how you approach control determines your destiny.
It is that simple.
I spoke last night to a group of athletes, parents and coaches. There was so much I wanted to share about mental performance training and narrowing it down was much harder than I expected.
I finally settled on the one factor that is consistent for all of us. If we focus on the wrong things, we will not be successful…in anything!
Determining when and where to focus is the difference between being able to perform at our best and going with the flow of our emotions or the situation.
In a tip a few months ago I talked about making a list of the things we can control and the things we can’t. I recommended that we choose random times throughout the season to do a controllables check in to have our athletes rate how well they are controlling the controllables.
This is a simple and useful exercise. But there is more we can do!
What this exercise does not include that can make it even more impactful is getting our athletes to make a plan for how they will control what they can control AND getting them to brainstorm ways that they can INFLUENCE the things they can’t control.
We spend at least 60% of our time focused on things we cannot control. This means we are spending less then half of our energy on the things that can actually push the needle forward for us!
What a waste of time and energy!
Understanding the difference between what we can and can’t control is a start! We can control what time we get up, if we decide to get a workout in, how much water we drink each day, how many reps we do out of the assigned set, along with the usual effort, attitude, mindset answers we usually get to this question.
To shift the percentage of time we waste on uncontrollables, how can we influence the things that are out of our control? Can we assign less importance to them, ignore them, help change the environment to lessen their impact?
As a softball coach, I dealt with a lot of what thought were bad calls from umpires.
Disclaimer: 😊 Before I go on, let me say that I have the utmost respect for officials. I would not want the job and know they take it VERY seriously. Some of what is to come is in jest and some is just a part of the game!
As a coaches, we deal with bad calls on field and court throughout the season. They can change games, cause frustration and become a distraction.
No matter how right you are, how frustrated you get or how many times you get out your rule book to prove your point, YOU CANNOT CONTROL a call that has happened or is yet to come!
Do we just throw our hands up and say…” nothing I can do” and stomp around? Or do we plan ahead, knowing we will encounter this at some point on game day?
My former associate head coach had a great way of “influencing” bad calls.
Well, she definitely tried to INFLUENCE the calls. It worked on occasion and other times it led to irritated umpires (not just her alone here…we were told many times that we were a bit intimidating as we both erupted when we through we were wronged).
In our fury, she knew she had to keep the kids in the game, so her bad call mantra was, “remember girls, this isn’t their full-time job.” It broke the tension, assigned less importance and helped them move on (I am not sure it helped her move on 😊).
This mantra served as an “influence” on how long this bad call would say in our craw. We know holding on to what has already happened does not positively influence what comes next. So this little “plan” helped us move to the next play.
When we are faced with inconsistencies or erratic play, it is a good time to go back and talk about controllables.
What is getting our focus? What can we completely eliminate from our focus? What can we change our response or reaction to for those other things we know will happen but fall outside our circle of control?
A simple review may get us back to focusing on one play at a time.
We cannot manage or attack the play that is happening if we are focused on things that DO NOT MATTER in the moment. The things that DO NOT MATTER usually fall in the uncontrollables section of the controllables worksheet.
If we can identify and manage those things that affect our focus with an if/then or when/then plan, we have a much better chance of managing our 4Ps of performance – being PRESENT and POSITIVE, following our PROCESS and having big POSTURE.
A feeling of control also boosts our confidence. Have you ever seen a truly confident person floating around in the wind being distracted by anything that pops up in life?
Every single moment of every single day we get to decide what gets our focus and attention. But to perform at our best, we need to have a plan – a plan to execute the and conquer the things we can control and a plan to influence or eliminate the things we can’t!
It’s time to gain control! What’s your plan?
Julie
Mindset Made Simple Tip #37 – It All Comes Back to Control
Control. We have it. We give it away. We succumb to it. Someone or something always has it.
As humans, we don’t like to be controlled. Yet taking control is difficult, time consuming and takes practice (other things we don’t always like).
No matter where you are in your season or life, how you approach control determines your destiny.
It is that simple.
I spoke last night to a group of athletes, parents and coaches. There was so much I wanted to share about mental performance training and narrowing it down was much harder than I expected.
I finally settled on the one factor that is consistent for all of us. If we focus on the wrong things, we will not be successful…in anything!
Determining when and where to focus is the difference between being able to perform at our best and going with the flow of our emotions or the situation.
In a tip a few months ago I talked about making a list of the things we can control and the things we can’t. I recommended that we choose random times throughout the season to do a controllables check in to have our athletes rate how well they are controlling the controllables.
This is a simple and useful exercise. But there is more we can do!
What this exercise does not include that can make it even more impactful is getting our athletes to make a plan for how they will control what they can control AND getting them to brainstorm ways that they can INFLUENCE the things they can’t control.
We spend at least 60% of our time focused on things we cannot control. This means we are spending less then half of our energy on the things that can actually push the needle forward for us!
What a waste of time and energy!
Understanding the difference between what we can and can’t control is a start! We can control what time we get up, if we decide to get a workout in, how much water we drink each day, how many reps we do out of the assigned set, along with the usual effort, attitude, mindset answers we usually get to this question.
To shift the percentage of time we waste on uncontrollables, how can we influence the things that are out of our control? Can we assign less importance to them, ignore them, help change the environment to lessen their impact?
Disclaimer: 😊 Before I go on, let me say that I have the utmost respect for officials. I would not want the job and know they take it VERY seriously. Some of what is to come is in jest and some is just a part of the game!
As a coaches, we deal with bad calls on field and court throughout the season. They can change games, cause frustration and become a distraction.
No matter how right you are, how frustrated you get or how many times you get out your rule book to prove your point, YOU CANNOT CONTROL a call that has happened or is yet to come!
Do we just throw our hands up and say…” nothing I can do” and stomp around? Or do we plan ahead, knowing we will encounter this at some point on game day?
My former associate head coach had a great way of “influencing” bad calls.
Well, she definitely tried to INFLUENCE the calls. It worked on occasion and other times it led to irritated umpires (not just her alone here…we were told many times that we were a bit intimidating as we both erupted when we through we were wronged).
In our fury, she knew she had to keep the kids in the game, so her bad call mantra was, “remember girls, this isn’t their full-time job.” It broke the tension, assigned less importance and helped them move on (I am not sure it helped her move on 😊).
This mantra served as an “influence” on how long this bad call would say in our craw. We know holding on to what has already happened does not positively influence what comes next. So this little “plan” helped us move to the next play.
When we are faced with inconsistencies or erratic play, it is a good time to go back and talk about controllables.
What is getting our focus? What can we completely eliminate from our focus? What can we change our response or reaction to for those other things we know will happen but fall outside our circle of control?
A simple review may get us back to focusing on one play at a time.
We cannot manage or attack the play that is happening if we are focused on things that DO NOT MATTER in the moment. The things that DO NOT MATTER usually fall in the uncontrollables section of the controllables worksheet.
If we can identify and manage those things that affect our focus with an if/then or when/then plan, we have a much better chance of managing our 4Ps of performance – being PRESENT and POSITIVE, following our PROCESS and having big POSTURE.
A feeling of control also boosts our confidence. Have you ever seen a truly confident person floating around in the wind being distracted by anything that pops up in life?
Every single moment of every single day we get to decide what gets our focus and attention. But to perform at our best, we need to have a plan – a plan to execute the and conquer the things we can control and a plan to influence or eliminate the things we can’t!
It’s time to gain control! What’s your plan?
Julie
P.S. If you or those you lead would like some help in gaining control of focus, I can help build a plan. Call, text or email me anytime!
Certified Mental Performance & Mindset Coach
SSB Performance
www.ssbperformance.com
juliej@ssbperformance.com • 234-206-0946
Facebook/ssbperformance
@SSBMindset
Be strong and courageous. Joshua 1:9
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